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Midnight Sunroom

by Russ Fitzgerald

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1.
She would take me home tonight I know it wouldn't be right Deep inside I know I'll always love you so No matter who's beside me My heart belongs to you I should hate you, I know But somehow I just can't let go I think I've reached the end And my tears just start again No matter who's beside me My heart belongs to you If she took me upstairs She could try her best I doubt she'd raise even my Interest I know it can't be the same But someday I hope things can change And through my night so black Lives the hope that you'll come back No matter who's beside me My heart belongs to you She would take me home tonight I know it wouldn't be right Deep inside I know I'll always love you, so No matter who's beside me My heart belongs to you
2.
If I say I'm almost over you Does saying that make it almost true It's hard to tell And sometimes that's just as well Think of all the times we've had And try to decide if that's good or bad Who can say When these things work either way I'll take a moment to consider What's been said And let those words echo 'round my head I know, all that's so Still that doesn't change how I feel for you White lies, alibis What do I do about you I don't have to play the part Of some poor fool with his broken heart If I decline To accept another line I'll just take that chip right off my shoulder And act my age Although rage is all the rage I know, all that's so Still that doesn't change how I feel for you Pet names, bedroom games What do I do When I know that all that's so And still that doesn't change how I feel for you I know that all that's so, still What would I do without you
3.
Solitary 02:17
The rain came down Outside my cell My cup of life lies spilled Upon the ground A day in May Reflected here I felt it pass so near Without a sound The bars that surround me Are shapeless and vague The chains that have bound me Are debts left unpaid But someday I'll walk out A free man again Like a once-withered flower Made fresh by the rain I'll always wonder Was it all in vain Now I see My jailer is me I'm only a prisoner Of my own dream
4.
December 02:50
Now it's finally December I find I'm hanging on To something I'm not sure I could remember I don't want to know if I was wrong Felt so sure this summer But it faded oh so fast Now I feel so much doubt Oh, when will this pass Maybe in a year or two Something will work out then But I won't hold my breath Waiting for you to come 'round again Finish off my bottle Put your picture away Once again I wonder Is anything left for me to say Now it's finally December And I find I'm hanging on To something I'm not sure ever existed I don't want to know if I was wrong I don't want to know if I was wrong
5.
6.
Nothing you could do Nothing you could say Would ever turn me away From your side On the darkest day In the blackest night Your smile is just enough light To truly guide my way No matter what's been said No matter what's been done Inside or out of my head I know that we've just begun Down the narrow path To the narrowest door I find less is more When I would pass through So take a second look Maybe a second verse It's never a curse When it's about you Underneath our skins Down to where we're true It begins and it ends And now I know Nothing could be better than to spend the rest of my life with you Sometimes the smallest part Of the tiniest seed Might be all that I need To get me through the day And nothing you could say Nothing you could do Would ever turn me from you Here is where I'll stay
7.
Tell me again how much you love me And how you'll always be there Tell me again you want to hold me And ease all my pain and cares It never lasts It's all in the past And I won't see you anymore Still, meet me at the last exit to Babylon, my love Only there will I see you one more time, my love Clutch me again to your sweet-scented skin Clutch me like velvet-wrapped steel Gasp out my name into my ear Make all my senses reel Knowing all along You're already gone And I won't see you anymore Still, meet me at the last exit to Babylon, my love Only there will I see you one more time, my love Can't we pretend It didn't end And soon I'll hold you once again Close my eyes with kisses four Come lie down here by my side Tell me of children we will have And tell me of the horses they'll ride It's far too late But still I'll wait Though I won't see you anymore Still, meet me at the last exit to Babylon, my love Only there will I see you one more time, my love
8.
Holding out for great expectations Gotta wait until I make a score Delay my own gratification All my life they've told me Wait for more When I'm trying to hide, trying to run I may be alone, I'm not the only one Ask for one day, ask for the moon Those prayers don't get answered soon First they told me, wait till you're older Then they said I had to become young Wanna cry but I can't find a shoulder And there's more sad songs than can be sung When I'm trying to hide, trying to run I may be alone, I'm not the only one Ask for one day, ask for the moon Those prayers don't get answered soon I've known all along I'm living a waiting game I've known all along There's no one else to blame When I'm trying to hide, trying to run I may be alone, I'm not the only one Ask for one day, ask for the moon Those prayers don't get answered soon
9.
Sacrifice 02:56
You could burn many candles, say many prayers Whatever's happening might never reach you You could work out the angles, see soothsayers They'll never tell you what you know to be true In the end it's all inside, it leaves you with no place to hide Betrayal by another name remains what it is And somebody must pay the price Of being first with the headlines The ones who gain are not the ones we sacrifice Well, when they break down his door and cut his throat in the street There'll be words about the way things were before this began Now there's profits to be made, deadlines to beat Nothing stands in the way of the polls or the banks It seems to me I've heard before, all is fair in love and war But even I must draw the line at some point it seems Giving up somebody's name To men to whom it's not a game And killing him yourself are really one and the same Somebody must pay the price Of being first with the headlines The ones who gain are not the ones we sacrifice
10.
Water 03:13
Stranger, you have come Out into the noon-day sun And you want water from a well Water from the well Who are you to talk to me Why can't you just let me be There's just water in this well There's only water in this well But then you look at me With eyes I can't describe Like you know me through and through And I find I can't turn aside Who are you I know I'm not the first Who could never quench that thirst With water from a well Water from a well You say there's a stream within Flowing with life that never ends Is there more you could tell Please, is there more you would tell Then you look at me With those eyes I can't describe You always knew me through and through As I finally realize It is true And I will go and tell them You are here
11.
There’s no alone like the alone that Follows the sound when you hang up the phone I know nothing I say to you is anything you could hear So I’ll sit in the silence and I’ll hold a phone to my ear And I’ll still believe in you And I’ll still believe in you What’s the point of telling you the things you could mean to me When the things I see in you are things you’ll never see I can be such a fool when it’s something about you And then I shake my head over all of the dumb things we do And I’ll still believe in you And I’ll still believe in you And if it’s a burden it’s one I chose to bear I hoped that your silence never meant you didn’t care I don’t want to break you or bend you to my will And I don’t want to shake you or tie you down or hold you still It’s more than pretty words that might make you cry It’s about trying to tell you and show you why That I still believe in you That I still believe in you

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released June 16, 2020

cover art by Ana Fitzgerald

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Russ Fitzgerald Greenwood, South Carolina

Russ Fitzgerald formed Macon roots rock band The Deadbeats in 1986. He launched his solo acoustic career in 1989 and played through the next decade. Midnight Sunroom is his first album and marks his return to public performance.

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